Tactics
by CCS AnGeL00
Summary: [GohanVidel][One-Shot] She would not bend and she would not fold, but he will push her to limits beyond the imaginable. Pray for her soul.


**Notes**:  Just a little one-shot.  Please don't kill me.  *gives angelic Gohan smile* 

**Disclaimer:**  Toriyama owns my soul.  

**Rated:  **PG-13 for language.  Mostly Videl's.  Because she's a potty mouth.  -^_^-

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Tactics  
By: CCS Angel00   
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The sun was blazing in the clear blue sky, beating down on the two adversaries as they faced off. The chilling autumn wind blew their hair across their faces, obstructing their view from the other's gaze. The grass flowed like the sea, brushing at their ankles. The tension was thick and nerve wracking as the two rivals waited for the other to make a move. A twitch of an eye, the curve of a smile, anything to break the stillness. Neither blinked. Both were prideful, neither willing to fold, or accept defeat. They both had a purpose, something important they were not willing to give up at any cost. Finally, one spoke, breaking the maddening silence.

"We ARE friends, Videl," a young man's voice insisted as he crossed his arms over his broad chest, wincing when his voice cracked slightly. "And there's really nothing you can do about it."

She scowled and he trembled for a moment. Who knew a girl so _little could be scarier than Cell? Unfortunately, Gohan Son did. Firsthand. She was always so leery and glaring at him. She was always saying something about how he was being secretive and keeping things from her. How rude! He was a very trustworthy guy --  barring the whole having a secret identity thing._

Oh dear. Did she just growl? All he wanted to was run away from her piercing stare and crawl under a rock, but he knew he had to stand firm. What would his father… no.  What would _Mr. Piccolo_ think if he had accepted defeat by a girl who was practically half his size and wore her hair in _pigtails_? But, Gohan thought with a cringe, she seemed a lot taller at the moment. And scarier.

"We are not nor will we ever be friends. I don't have any friends. I am a loner. If you are so desperately in need of a friend, get a puppy." She tossed her hair over her shoulder. She was dressed casually, in a long white tee-shirt with purple sleeves and a pair of light blue denim Capri pants. She was a very pretty girl, Gohan thought, but didn't she ever smile? Or at least… stop glaring? 

Gohan shook his head. "You need friends, Videl."

"I DON'T NEED YOU! SO LEAVE ME ALONE YOU NUTCASE!

"You do too need me as a friend and guess what? I'll be your friend forever and ever and EVER!" Ha, he could be just as stubborn. 

"Has the fact that you're completely psycho managed to escape your attention?! WE ARE _NOT_ FRIENDS YOU FUCKING WEIRDO!" He was sure he heard a growl that time.

"Oh _yes we are." He almost added, "So there," but realized that only really worked for really cute kids like Goten._

"NEVER!" Her cheeks were turning an attractive shade of red that he found very cute and amusing. If nothing, it was sure fun to ruffle a few of the Ice Princess' feathers. Gohan chuckled as Videl started clutching her fists and panting. No wonder Goten and Trunks got such a kick out of annoying him all the time. "We'll see," he answered serenely.

Videl braced herself and tried to calm her trembling hands. "How long can you hold your breath?"

Gohan gave her a silly grin, sticking his hands into the pockets of his jeans. "A very long time." Inside, he was a bit distraught. It was obvious the girl had some serious trust and attitude issues, not to mention was horribly lonely but was too proud to admit it. He knew what it was like to be lonesome only too well. Sure, he had his Dad's friends and Mr. Piccolo and Dende and Mr. Popo, but he always yearned for people his own age to be with. 

He and Videl were really not so different. They had each lost a parent at around the same age, lived with a crazy sometimes overbearing parent, and had this insane need to prove themselves. True, she was way pushier and obstinate as she was intent on finding out all of his secrets, but what was the probability of THAT happening? He was _way_ too slick to ever let his secret identities slip. He would be her friend and she would never have to know he was the Gold Fighter and the Great Saiyaman!

She finally sighed, putting her hands on her hips. "Whatever, Gohan. I'm going to be late for class."

"Can I carry your books for you?"

She rolled her eyes and started to walk away.

"Is that a no?"

"That's a _hell_ no." 

The challenge was met. 

He would become Videl's friend and make her smile, so help him God.

How hard could it be?

* * *

"Hello Videl. Made anyone cry today?" Miya, Videl's good natured housekeeper, asked with a cheery smile.

Videl threw her bag on the floor and sat down at her kitchen table, reaching for one of Miya's chocolate chip cookies. "Sadly, no. But it's only three o'clock so I've got plenty of time to work on it."

Miya took a small piece of paper down from the refrigerator. "I have a phone message for you. It was a boy," Miya wriggled her eyebrow teasingly. "He was so polite!"

"A boy?" Videl asked taking a sip of milk. "What was his name?"

"Gohan, I think. He said he was a close friend of yours."

Videl spit out her milk, nearly choking on her cookie. Her face turned red as she tried to dislodge the cookie from her throat. "WHAT?! Impossible! He wouldn't have the nerve— CLOSE FRIEND? I'm going to _kill_—" As if the young man following her around all day like a lost puppy wasn't bad enough, now he was trying to find her after school!

"Videl, is there something you're not telling me? Who is this boy and when can I meet him? You know how your father is about boys," Miya lowered her voice. "But I won't tell if you won't."

Videl took a deep breath. "It's not like that, Miya. He's a boy in my class who seems to think I need friends. He's kind of shady if you ask me. A real shifty guy. I think he's somehow connected to the Great Saiyadork, but I still need hardcore proof. Anyway, I don't like him."

"You don't like anyone," Miya pointed out.

Videl snatched her AP physics text book from her bag and shoved it under her arm. "Let me rephrase that. I hate him with the fire of a thousand suns. I don't want to talk about him anymore. I'm getting a nauseous. Call me when dinner is ready," 

Videl trudged up the stairs and flopped onto her bed, sighing deeply.  She was about to settle in for a small nap when a beeping caught her attention. Videl reached over and grabbed her cell phone from her desk. She did a double take when she flipped it open. "A voice message?" She quickly called her cell phone, waiting for the operator's monotone voice. "I HAVE SIXTY-SEVEN VOICE MESSAGES?! WHAT THE HELL?!" She listened to the first five, her right eye twitching in annoyance when she heard the voice to whom the other sixty-two messages belonged to.

"Hi Videl! It's your _good friend_ Gohan Son just calling to see how you—" Click. Delete. Videl threw small silver phone against the wall, burying her head under her pillow. How had he gotten that number? It wasn't even listed! 

She threw the pillow on the floor and traipsed towards her laptop, running a hand through her messy hair. She quickly typed in her password, blinking when she heard the familiar, "You've got mail."  Videl looked at her mailbox once. Twice. Three times. Her eyes must have been playing tricks on her because she knew her mailbox couldn't possibly contain one hundred and sixteen e-mails. "Okay, maybe it's just junk e-mail," Videl clicked on the mail box, nearly keeling over when she saw what it contained. They were all from a user she had never even HEARD from before but it wasn't junk e-mail. Against her better judgment, she clicked one open that had the subject: TO MY FRIEND. 

"FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THE IS GOOD AND HOLY!" Videl wailed, crashing to the ground. "Why can't he just leave me alone? I swear to God, if he just leaves me alone I'll stop trying to figure out what he's hiding! I don't care if he's the Great Saiyaman!!! I JUST DON'T CARE!"

"Videl?" Miya's sweet voice called from down stairs.

Videl stood up and composed herself, running her fingers through her hair. She walked down the stairs, nearly tumbling the rest of the way down the stairs when she saw a giant letter "F" standing in her doorway. To be more precise, it was a man _wearing_ a huge, foam, letter "F", and was currently sounding out few notes on his harmonica. 

"Singing telegram for Videl Satan!" He informed her happily, handing her a small white piece of paper to read, though she was too shocked to do anything but stand there. "F is for fun, which is what we have together, R is for—" Videl slammed the door unceremoniously in the giant F's face, a vein in her forehead pulsating dangerously.

"What about my tip?" He whined.

She threw a few bills out of the door. "I know another 'F' word to complete your song. Don't TEMPT me, you sorry excuse for an alphabet letter on crack." And with that, she slammed the door in his face.

"Bitch."

Restraining herself from going after the giant F and kicking his ass to the end of the alphabet, she noticed the small paper in her hand and opened it. "To my friend, Videl. Hope you enjoyed this as much as I did. Your good friend, GOHAN?!" Videl ripped up the paper, flames dancing in her eyes. "I'M GOING TO MURDER HIM!!!" Videl stomped up the her room once more, her hunger forgotten and leaving Miya confused and a bit amused. 

Videl knew one thing for sure.

She would get Gohan Son, if it was the last thing she did. 

She would get him GOOD.

* * *

Happy with plans of vengeance, blood and terror, Videl snuggled into her pillow and dozed off to sleep at around ten-thirty, in hopes of dreaming of Gohan's downfall. Many hours past before she was woken up to the sound of a small pebble hitting her window. She tried to ignore it, enjoying immensely the part of her dream where she got to roast Gohan alive and feed him to her father's Dobermans, Fluff and Puff. 

Videl groaned as a large stone hit her window, cracking it slightly.  She glared at the alarm clock (three _fucking_ in the morning, _goddammit_) and trudged towards her window.  

She blinked.

And then blinked again.

"What the fuck!?" Once she snapped out of her shock, her mouth followed suit.  She threw open the window and nearly fell out at what she saw.  It was pitch black outside (because it was three fucking in the morning, _goddammit_) and there stood Gohan, along with the entire Orange Star High School Marching Band, smiling happily up at her. "GOHAN?!"

"Hit it guys!" Gohan commanded, the smile never leaving his face. As the trumpets started up, Gohan started to sing. "Keep smiling, keep shining, knowing you can always count on me… for sure! That's what friend are foooooor!" 

Oh _God_. He was doing hand motions.

Videl winced as his singing continued. Gohan was horribly off key and sounded like a cat that accidentally got caught in a blender that was set on puree. He winked up at her, seemingly amused at her disheveled appearance. She knew her hair was probably sticking up at all angles and her tee-shirt, which had once belonged to one of Erasa's older brothers, was so big it was falling off of her left shoulder.

"Lean on me, when you're not strong — "

_And it was then officer,_ she imagined herself saying,_ I could no longer restrain myself. I had to kill Gohan Son in cold blood with my bare hands._

He showed no intention of stopping, so she threw her brush at him, beaming him right in the face. "GO HOME! It's three in the morning, you fanatical FREAK!" She shut her window, closed her shade and jumped into her bed, huddling under the covers. What was his _problem_? What had she ever done to him? Sure, there were a few accusations here and there about being Saiyaman and indecent exposure on the school roof, but she never did anything to deserve THIS! But one thing was for sure. She would **never** accept defeat.

She would be Gohan Son's friend when they held the winter Olympics in _hell_.

* * *

Needless to say, Videl had problems returning to her sleeping state (fearing nightmares of Gohan chasing her around singing bad Celine Dion songs) and was pretty tired when seven am rolled around. She was too tired to do much but shower and throw on whatever clothes managed to be in reach. She didn't even have enough energy to put her hair up, or do much except brush it. Her normally sparkling blue eyes were red rimmed and the left one would twitch every so often as if expecting something like a Gohan Son shaped balloon to pop out of her closet, confetti to drop, and a little piece of paper that said "Be my friend" to come falling out on her.

How _did_ he get that in there without her knowing, anyway?

Her hands trembled as she held a cup of coffee in her hand, nearly spilling all over her black sleeveless shirt and black Capri pants, but she managed to get to the kitchen table without hurting herself. She got to the table, took a chug of her black coffee and waited for Miya to start serving breakfast. 

"Good morning, Videl." Videl grunted some what of a response. "You look so nice with your hair down, dear. You should really wear it that way more often. No morning run today?" Videl grunted again. "Missed it, huh? Well one day won't kill you. You're fit as a fiddle!" Miya said cheerfully. "By the way, I found your cell phone in the bread box yesterday. Should I be concerned?" Videl shook her head slightly. "I admit the singing telegram yesterday was bit—" Videl glared. "Oh stop that. If you keep making faces your face with freeze like that. Here you go, eggs with bacon. And look, it's happy to see you!" The eyes indeed made in the shape of eyes and the bacon smiling back at her.

"Good morning," Satan boomed, taking a can of beer out of the refrigerator. 

Miya shook her head. "Honestly, Mr. Satan. Beer at seven in the morning?" She sighed and wiped her hands on her apron. "Videl be a dear and get the newspaper for me?"

Feeling a little better after drinking her third cup of coffee, Videl opened her front door and picked up the paper. She must have been really tired, because she could have sworn she was on the front page. With Gohan. And the headline read "GOHAN SON AND VIDEL SATAN: FRIENDS UNTIL THE END. FULL STORY ON PAGE SIXTY SIX." But that couldn't possibly be right.

It just…

…couldn't be.

But there it was.

And apparently all over page sixty-six.

Videl open her mouth.

And screamed bloody murder.

After taking a few moments to calm herself, she stuffed the paper in her bag, ignoring Satan's protests. She had to get those papers back. ALL of them. She could never live this down.  Her reputation would be ruined. She started with all the papers on her block, which was easy enough, but then graduated to grocery stores and coffee kiosks.  Finally she had to get her jetcopter to get all the papers out of the area. When Videl reached her copter, she nearly laughed. There was yet another little piece of paper addressed to her. She ripped it open.

_Dear Vi, (Do you mind if I call you that? Best friends need nicknames!)_

"So we've graduated to best friends, have we?" Videl asked tersely.

_How did you like my tribute to our newfound friendship in the newspaper? You should read the article on page sixty-six. I was up all night writing it for you._

_Have a nice day at school! _-^_^-__

_Love,  
Gohan_

"He had the nerve to draw the fucking smiley face," Videl jumped into her copter and headed for school, forgetting briefly about her quest for the newspaper.

* * *

Dr. Briefs looked at his newspaper, frowning slightly. "What's wrong Dad?" Bulma asked, revving the engine to the motorcycle she was fixing.

"There's no front page! Or page sixty-six! Someone is in big trouble at the Satan Sun."

Bulma just smirked. Seemed like a certain young Satan was getting exasperated with a certain young adoring Son. And this was only the start of it. How fun this was!

* * *

Videl landed at school, growling under her breath as soon as said Son was in sight. "YOU!"

"Good morning, Videl! You look nice today, I like your hair—" He was cut off by the feel of her hands around his neck. "That kind of hurts, Videl. If you wanted a hug you should have asked."

"I DON'T WANT A HUG! I WANT YOU TO **_FALL OFF OF A CLIFF!_** I WANT YOU TO LEAVE. ME. THE. FUCK. ALONE. YOU. _LOSER_!" She throttled him, letting out her frustrations. It felt pretty good, she had to admit.

Gohan gently detangled her hands from his neck. "I wanted to show you something," he said and started to unbutton his jacket.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. What kind of girl did he take her for? What clever, perverted thing was he planning?! First there was that thing with Angela with the teddy bear underwear and having his pants down on the roof and now this! "Gohan Son, what did I tell you about keeping your clothes — OH SWEET MERCIFUL GOD!" She screamed when got a view of what he was wearing. His shirt has an arrow pointing in her direction and said in bright, cheery letters, "I'M WITH MY BEST FRIEND!"

"How do you like it? I got it made just for us. I even have a shirt that says BEST FRIEND for you to wear! What do you think?"

Without another word, Videl turned and walked into school, trying to escape the obviously mentally disturbed teenager. _I swear, if this keeps up I'm going to put a restraining order on him. _She glared at a few freshmen who were giggling under their breaths and finally made her way to her locker. She sighed once more before opening the locker, frowning when it wouldn't budge. "Fuck. Fuck. FUCK!" Videl pulled the locker with all of her might, putting one leg on the locker below for leverage. When it finally opened, a sea of yellow roses, G+V tee shirts, towels, and other merchandise fell out on her. Her mouth dropped to the floor. How had he broken into her locker!? "GOHAN!!! How did you — WHY?! "  She hung her head in defeat.  "I must have done something really, really bad in a past life to deserve this."

Gohan beamed at her and handed her a nice sized boxed lunch that was wrapped in a cloth that was decorated with small white bunnies. He politely ignored her venomous looks and her curled fists. "I made this especially for you, Videl."

Erasa clasped her hands together. "That was so sweet of you, Gohan!"

Videl shoved the lunch away from her, feeling more than slightly nauseous. "I'm going to class. DON'T you dare ask me if you can carry my books or walk with me because I think we all know the answers to those ridiculous questions." Videl stomped off, throwing the yellow rose in a nearby garbage can.

Erasa looked up at Gohan who was still beaming. "You're so bad, Gohan. I've never seen anyone get under her skin like that before."

"You know, I started out with a goal to make her smile and to become friends. Now I'm just having fun annoying her!" Gohan rubbed his hands together. "Let the real games begin!

Videl slumped down into her seat, laying her head in her arms. This had been the most stressful day of her life and it was all because of that stupid Gohan. She had never hated someone so much in her entire life. She glared over at him, scowling when he smiled and waved back. Other students came filing in, getting ready for the morning announcements. 

"Good morning Orange Star! Today the Spanish club will meet at Tito's Tacos after school, por favor. Haha, just a little joke there," Principal Naoki chuckled at her own clever joke. She continued to announce various other clubs, including the pointless Chow Mein club that Sharpner swore he would have joined if he didn't already belong to the boxing club, what was on the menu for lunch (toxic waste with cheese or toxic waste with beef), and for Mr. Fujiya to move his BMW, because it was blocking her green Pinto.

Videl sighed. She seemed to be doing that a lot lately. Everything was going as normal —

"Have a good day… and a better day tomorrow! And don't forget, Gohan and Videl, best friends forever!"

The class broke out into excited chatter. Gohan and Videl were friends? Maybe even more! "Nooooo," she moaned, banging her head repeatedly on the desk, hoping to knock herself out. "No no no! You don't understand," she tried to explain to the classmates who swarmed her desk. "It's not like that."

"Class!" Ms. Beakman boomed, hoping to regain some order in the class. "Please turn to page one seventy six in your 'Hamlet' books please. Sharpner, will you please read for Polonius?"

Videl rested her head on her left hand, feeling her eyes droop and a tiny yawn escape her mouth. She felt a sharp poke on her left and turned her head slightly to find Erasa handing her a small piece of paper. Videl took the paper and carefully opened it, so that Ms. Beakman didn't see.

_Hi Videl!_

_How are you? You look tired._

_Didn't you get enough sleep last night?_

Videl glared at the now familiar hand writing and took a out a red pen to write her response. She handed it to Erasa under the desk, trying not to make too much eye contact with the hopeful looking Gohan.

Gohan couldn't believe his luck. She actually wrote back to him! Maybe somewhere, deep inside, she might actually like him! He unfolded the note, his hands shaking slightly.

**_FUCK OFF._**

… or maybe not. Undaunted, he scribbled back to her happily.

Videl eyed the note wearily. She rolled her eyes and opened the note once more, instantly regretting it.

_I'm sorry to hear you're not feeling well. Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?_

**_DROP DEAD._**

Well, that wasn't very nice. And here he was, concerned about her well being and she just snubbed him! Gohan put his pen to his lips.

_Want to hang out this weekend? We can go to the park, hold hands (best friends do that, you know) ^-^, and have a picnic. What do you say?_

**_THE ONLY WAY I'D EVER TOUCH YOU WOULD BE IF I CAME DOWN WITH LEPROSY._**

Videl ignored all of his other attempts to communicate with her.  He had to be the most annoying kid on this entire planet. Didn't he understand that she didn't like him? What was so hard to understand? Had she not made herself clear? For a smart guy, he was so unbelievably stupid. Why would he even want to be her friend in the first place? Most people usually worshipped her from afar, too scared to get any closer than that.   And really, she was fine with that.  As long as she was left alone to fight crime, train, and study, she didn't care what the other students thought of her. 

_I don't mind being alone. I have no need for friendship, friendship causes pain. I am a rock, an island. A rock feels no pain and an island never cries… oh my GOD, now I'm quoting Simon and Garfunkle. Someone shoot me._

"Here," Erasa poked her one last time, handing her a new note. 

Unable to contain her curiosity, she opened the note.

_People aren't meant to be alone._

Videl stared at the note for awhile, and then, for the first time, tried to catch Gohan's eye.  To her surprise, she found that he was actually paying attention to the lesson and not to her.  _Well_, she thought, crumpling up the note.  _What does he know about it, anyway?_  

The bell rang, signifying the beginning of their history class began.  Their teacher had been absent for the past week, and different substitutes had tried their hands at the class all with the same, predicted results. Videl didn't care about signing the attendance sheets with fake names or anything like that (though she did find it amusing).  All she wanted was some sweet, merciful sleep.  She was about to lay her head down onto her desk when the substitute walked in.

"Hello class. Since your regular teacher is not here, I'll be showing you a slide show of my trip overseas." A small woman with puffy blond and glasses hair fumbled with the projection machine at the front of the room.

"This is going to be so boring," Erasa groaned with the rest of the class. "Don't you think so, Gohan?"

Gohan grinned an perfectly angelic smile. "Perhaps not." 

Videl's head snapped back up.  She didn't like that answer. She didn't like it at all. 

The lights dimmed and Ms. Ainoko clicked the remote control to start the show. "And here I am waving with my left hand." Click. "Here I am again, except I'm waving with my right hand!" Click. "Now I'm waving with both hands!"

"This woman is one sandwich short of a picnic basket," Sharpner whispered through the side of his mouth. 

"And here is—oh my," Ainoko blinked at the slide that certainly didn't belong to her. Videl's eyes widened to the size of dinner plates.  She couldn't… she was just… 

TO MY BEST FRIEND VIDEL, LOVE ALWAYS GOHAN!!!!! (WITH A LITTLE DRAWING OF GOHAN SMIRKING IN THE CORNER!!!!)

It was the smirk that proved to be her undoing.

"Oh dear," Ainoko wailed as the machine started sparking.  The screen went black and she flailed as she got tangled in the wires. The lights soon flickered and went out completely, plunging the room into total darkness. The class was too busy talking about the new revelations of Gohan and Videl to really mind. 

"Oh my," said Ainoko, finally detangling herself.  "I should go find the custodian to fix these lights!  Please behave yourselves children!" she called as she exited the room.  "Ms. Satan!  You're in charge!"

Videl smiled sweetly at the substitute, waiting until she was halfway down the hallway before turning to Gohan.  "You son of a bitch!!!" Videl leapt out of her seat, considering the pros and cons of murdering Gohan with her pen. "STOP RUINING MY LIFE!" Videl felt herself being restrained by Sharpner. "LET ME AT HIM!!!"

The lights soon flickered on and Gohan looked at her, the same angelic smile on his face. "Calm down, Videl. No need to get so upset. I just wanted to let everyone know how much I care about you." He was blushing, and… and… SMILING!  That little slime ball. That STUPIDLY STUPID smile was starting to get to her. Perhaps Shakespeare said it best. "One may smile and smile and be a villain."

"WHO ARE _YOU_ TO BE TELLING _ME_ NOT TO GET UPSET?! I HATE, _HATE_, **_HATE_** YOU!!!" Videl panted, her angry expression wavering slightly when she saw the hurt expression on his face. She slumped back into her seat and put her head in her hands, trying to stop the tears from falling down her cheeks in frustration.

"Me thinks the lady doth protesth too much," Erasa said cheerily, filing her nails. "I think Videl really _does_ like you, Gohan." 

Gohan perked up noticeably. "You think?"

"NO!!!" Videl screamed, wondering if he even heard her. 

"You know, I bet if this keeps up, Videl will start to like you so much that she'll want to _date_ you!"

Gohan looked genuinely embarrassed and blushed. "Heh… You really think so?" he asked in a much lower voice.

Videl started to bang her head against the desk.

"Hey Videl, you're going to really hurt yourself," Gohan said in a worried tone of voice. 

She sighed and rolled her eyes towards the heavens.

_Annoyance, thy name is Gohan Son._

* * *

Early one Sunday morning, Videl landed her jet copter in a clearing not far from the small Son home. She couldn't believe she had actually taken the time to look in the student directory for his address and go to his house. The madness had to stop. She was at her wit's end. She hadn't slept in days and he was EVERYWHERE she was. She had long since decided she would meet with him and try to get him to back off. She had a reputation to protect after all.

The house was cute, modest and completely isolated from everything. Whatever.   Gohan's family must be as weird as he is. She walked up to the front door and knocked gently. An adorable little boy with wild hair opened the door and stared at her. 

_This must be his little brother._ "Hi there," she said sweetly.  "Is Gohan home?"

"Who wants to know?" A harsh voice asked behind the child. A small woman with a dark bun walked into her view and frowned at her. "Goten, what did I tell you about opening the door to strangers?"

The little boy, Goten, grinned. "But mom, this isn't a stranger! This pretty girl is Gohan's friend!"

Videl scowled. Gohan had even brainwashed his brother into thinking they were friends. "Oh is she, now? Listen missy, if you're here to ask Gohan for a date—" 

_Oh my GOD! The delusion is hereditary! _

"— you better just forget THAT because my Gohan has to study and get into a good college and become a scholar and -- "

"Listen, lady," she interrupted rather rudely. "I'm not here to date your son. I'm here to tell him to stop STALKING me. Do you read the newspaper?" Videl pulled out the front page and showed it to the ranting woman. "And this is only the tip of the iceberg. I've gotten letters, tee-shirts, PA announcements, A SLIDE SHOW—"

Chi-Chi took a menacing step towards the girl, making her take a step back. She threw the newspaper back in her face. "That's impossible! My Gohan has been too busy studying to do any of those things. He's barely left the house unless it's to go school. If this an attempt to get me to let you date my son you've got another thing coming!"

Videl's jaw dropped. "B-but that's impossible." Could Gohan have a silent partner? Someone who was paying for all of the torture devices? He didn't exactly look well off and his mother swore he hasn't left the house…

"Goten," Gohan said from inside the house. "Who's at the door?"

Goten grinned. "A pretty lady who's yelling at Mom!"

Gohan lit up. "That must be… could it be?" He ran to the door, lighting up like a Christmas tree when he saw her. "Videl! You came to visit me! I'm so happy!"

"… I've got to go. I'll see you tomorrow," Videl turned around and ran towards her jetcopter. "I've got a mystery to solve."

Chi-Chi looked at her son, who looked like a wilted flower. "Gohan, this girl says that you've been stalking her.  It couldn't possibly be true, could it?"

Gohan laughed and scratched his head. "She's a good girl, Mom. But she doesn't have any friends so, I'm just trying to be her friend. That's all. Oh," he said looking up at the sky with a hazy, wistful expression. "I'm going to go to Capsule Corp. for a while. Is that okay?"

"Take Goten with you," Chi-Chi looked at her son strangely. 

_Oh Goku, this is what happens when you're not around. I think our son is so hard up for friends he has turned to pestering that girl! Wait, could it that he wants to be MORE then friends? _

Chi-Chi picked up the fallen article, scanning it over. "THE DAUGHTER OF MR. SATAN? She must be filthy RICH!!!"

Gohan nodded and slipped on his shoes. "She is."

"And this is the girl you're going to marry?!"

Goten popped his head into the room. "Videl is going to be my new sister?"

"NO! It's not like that!!!" Gohan blushed and flailed his arms. "We're leaving now."

But Chi-Chi wasn't listening.

_This girl is so loaded she could put Gohan through medical school AND law school!_

"Gohan, why is Mom all sparkly?"

A sigh. "Let's just go, Goten. She'll be like this all day."

!!!SparkleSparkleTwinkleShine!!!

… Or all month.

* * *

Videl stretched her left arm out over her head as she stopped to take a swig of water from her bottle with the right. The sun was beating down on her and she had been running for miles, but it felt wonderful. The wind gently tickled her bare arms and the constant swish of her Adidas pants calmed her deeply. Her muscles were starting to ache, but it was a _good_ ache. Jogging was the only way she could clear her head and think. Think about Gohan Son, destruction, and revenge.

"Why is he always on my mind?" Videl wondered as she wiped the sweat from her forehead. She pulled her long hair into a high ponytail and absently gazed up at a large hot pink billboard with cute little hearts and kittens on it. "To Videl: You are the wind beneath my wings." She started to jog again, not quite realizing what she had just read. 

Suddenly it hit her like a ton of bricks. 

"WHAT!? OH MY GOD! I'M ON A BILLBOARD!!!" Gohan Son was on CRACK. That had to be it. He was a drug abuser. He must have sniffed too much whiteout while studying. Only someone HIGH would do something like this. "AND WHERE THE HELL HAS MY FATHER BEEN WHILE ALL OF THIS GOING ON?!"

* * *

Satan looked at the newspaper in disbelief and slammed his mug of beer down on the table angrily. "Who is this kid that's obsessed with my baby girl?!"

"Why, that would be me sir," a cheerful voice said from behind him. Satan whirled around to see a young man with dark, gravity defying hair and dark eyes. "My name is Gohan Son."

Satan went nose to nose with the little punk. "Listen kid, there's no way you can—"

Gohan continued to smile cheerily. "But you may remember me from the Cell games. The delivery boy… remember?"

Satan nearly passed out right then and there. Of course, the boy that was stalking his daughter was the kid from the Cell games. Man, Karma was a bitch and a half! 

"And well, sir, I just came to tell you that I'm going to make your daughter my best friend and might I suggest you stay out of my way?"  Suddenly, his whole demeanor changed. His eyes were narrowed and Satan swore that his hair just flickered from black to gold and his eyes from black to turquoise, but he chalked it up to a fear induced illusion, "Because let's just say I'll deliver something else to your house that won't be as nice as pizza."

Satan squeaked.

Cheerful!Gohan came back, much to Satan's relief. "I'm glad we understand each other, sir. Have a great day!"

And finally, Satan fainted.

Later, Satan snuggled under his blanket in the attic, shivering slightly as he watched the small television.  He liked the attic, he decided.  He may just decide to hide out – er – hang out there for awhile. "Stupid kid… he's lucky he's so skinny and weak that I didn't beat him up…"

"Forgive me, Videl."

* * *

Videl sneezed and continued jogging. Gohan was probably talking about her at this moment. Or thinking about her. Or writing about her. Or Drawing about her.  The more she thought about it, the more nauseous she became. So engrossed in her thoughts, she didn't even see a person standing right in her path. Videl fell right down, landing in an awkward position with her right foot right under her.  She winced as her ankle twisted painfully. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah—" she started to say when she caught sight of a familiar pair of shoes… that were attached to a familiar pair of pants… that led up to a familiar shirt and vest… "Noooo, anyone but you," she groaned. "Why is it always you?!" She tried to stand up, but a sharp pain in her ankle caused her to fall right back down.

"You're hurt." Gohan kneeled down next to her, touching her ankle carefully. "It doesn't look broken, but you should put ice on it anyway. Luckily I know Bulma Briefs and she would be more than happy to help you," he grinned and pointed to the large building to their left. "You shouldn't put any pressure on that ankle. I'll just have to help you a little." He scooped her up into his arms easily.

"PUT ME DOWN!!!" she screamed, thrashing and flailing her arms. "I'D RATHER BE IN THE STREET GETTING RUN OVER BY A TRUCK THEN HAVING YOU CARRY ME!!!"

Bulma smirked as she heard the angered cry, taking a bite of her brownie. She, Krillin, and Yamcha were watching the scene unfold from inside of the Capsule Corp. kitchen window with amusement. "This is an unexpected turn of events."

"How so?" Krillin asked, craning his head to look out of the window.

"Gohan wasn't supposed to maul her, just invite her to hang out for a little. But this is a bonus. I almost feel sorry for her."

Yamcha grinned and took a swig of milk. He stood behind Krillin to get a look at the feuding couple. "Gohan seems to be having the time of his life carrying her. What exactly _is_ he trying to accomplish here?"

"I think he felt bed that she didn't consider them friends, so he had to do everything in his power to get her to like him," Bulma wiped her mouth with a napkin. "He never really had a carefree childhood where he could annoy people and play jokes on them. He's just having a little innocent fun.  There's nothing wrong with that."

Krillin raised an eyebrow, giving her an incredulous look. "I think you're having more fun than he is."

"If you can look past the fact Mr. Satan is her dad, they would be the perfect couple," Yamcha snorted in his milk at the thought.

"She is quite the looker, isn't she?" Krillin gave his two friends an evil grin. "Our little Gohan is growing up, annoying girls, and getting married.  Makes me want to cry."

"I SAID PUT ME DOWN YOU FOOL!!!"

"Nope." The three could hear the smile in his voice.

Trunks blinked at his best friend as they wandered into the kitchen for a snack. "What is all the screaming about?" He too peered out of the window, confused.

"That's big brother's new friend, Videl. Don't worry, they like to do stuff like this all the time," Goten assured him. "They like it."

Realizing that the attempt to get out of Gohan's arms was futile, Videl resigned to pouting like a child.  She crossed her arms over her chest as Gohan practically skipped, that little freak, into Capsule Corp. He placed her gently on a couch, excusing himself to go and find a first aid kit and some ice.

"Why, hello there. You must be Videl," A small, buxom woman with bright blue hair and eyes clasped her hands together happily. Videl immediately recognized her as Bulma Briefs, heiress to the Capsule Corp. fortune. Behind her was Yamcha, whom she recognized as an ex-baseball player who held the record for most consecutive fights in a single season.  There was also a short guy who she didn't recognize at all. Two children also filed into the room, both of whom were giggling like mad. "Gohan's friend from school, right?"

Videl opened her mouth to object, but Gohan chose that moment to waltz into the room, ice and first aid kit in hand. He rolled up her pant leg, gently took off her boot,  and pressed the ice to her ankle. He smiled apologetically when she winced. 

"Gohan, aren't you going to introduce us to this cute young lady friend of yours?" Yamcha asked, winking at Videl. Videl didn't know what was more annoying; being called cute or being called Gohan's lady friend. "I'm Yamcha, this is Krillin," he pointed to the short man, "I'm sure you know Bulma and her son Trunks. This little guy is Gohan's brother."

Goten grinned cutely. "We've met before."

"I really should be going— " 

"Don't be silly, Videl!" Gohan took the ice off and started wrapping an ace bandage around her sore ankle. He was so careful and gentle, Videl kind of, almost, somewhat didn't loathe him at that moment. "And as soon as I'm done with this, I'll drive you home!"

Videl nearly blanched. Him? Driving her home? And risk getting seen by people? By Miya? By HER FATHER? "Oh, that really isn't necessary. I can make it home just fine, thanks," she tried giving them a weak smile.

"Well, okay.  If you don't want to be driven I can always carry you home. That might be nice too," Gohan gave her the Annoyingly-Cute-And-Innocent-Smile-From-Hell.

Videl tried to ignore the snickers coming from the direction of the adults. "No, a drive home would be… _nice_," she spat the work out like poison. Videl twitched as Bulma tried unsuccessfully to hold back a snort of laughter. 

"Dr. Briefs," a familiar looking blond woman raced into the room, tangled up in various wires. "You're needed in the lab ASAP."

Videl stared in disbelief. "Ms. Ainoko?!" She turned to Gohan, who went a little red. "Why is our substitute teacher here? GOHAN SON, I WANT ANSWERS!!!"

Ainoko giggled and put her hands in front of her mouth, straining her voice to a high falsetto. "Ohohoho, little girl! I have never seen you in my life!" She ran out of the room, stumbling over a few wires.

"Teacher? That's just my assistant. You must be mistaken, dear," Videl swore little horns just shot out of Bulma's head.

Hm… This was suspicious. Bulma Briefs was rich enough to buy all that stuff and was certainly having a laugh at her expense… could she be Gohan's silent partner in her torture?! She'd have to investigate this at a later time.

"There! All done!" Gohan nodded at his handiwork and picked up Videl easily. It was obvious he would not be answering any of her questions, as usual.

Videl scrambled for excuses to get out of Gohan's arms. "I'm too heavy!" she blurted out. "You should just put me down!"

He grabbed a capsule from Bulma with the hand that was under her knees and started to walk out of Capsule Corp, nodding a goodbye to his friends and brother as they left. "You're as light as a feather! Now be a good girl and sit tight," Gohan set Videl down in the backseat, being extra careful not to hurt her sore ankle. "You know, I think my friends really like you."

"Then you have some pretty idiotic friends," Videl snapped, her eyes narrowing at the speedometer as Gohan slowed down at the yellow light. "Can't you go any faster?! You drive like an old blind woman! And you could have MADE that light, you know!"

"Yes, Videl."

"And by the way, the New Kids on the Block called. They want their hairstyle back," she retorted.

"I always liked Danny the best. He was so under appreciated. How about you?" he asked cheerfully, allowing a cat cross the street in front of him.

Videl banged her head against the window. "Jordan," she sighed, too tired to think of a snappy comeback. 

"Really? I would have pictured you liking Donnie, you know, with the whole 'bad boy' thing going on…"

"Bad boy types get old really fast," she said absently. "I'd rather have a nice guy any day."

Gohan beamed.

There was hope for him yet.

* * *

Videl marched towards the front door of Capsule Corp., her hand hesitating over the doorbell when she reached her destination. Yes, she was going to demand answers from Bulma Briefs, and demand she would. Maybe, she could even convince Bulma to stop funding such dangerous enterprises such as Gohan's current obsession. 

"Okay, Satan," she whispered ringing the doorbell. "Be firm, be strong, be steadfast."

She blinked as a man who was only a few inches or so taller than her swung open the door, glaring down at her. He was rather intimidating for such a small man, with a black battle aura that practically flashed DO NOT FUCK AROUND WITH ME.   He was incredibly wide shouldered and chiseled, with dark eyes that seemed to shoot daggers at her. But Videl had a mission. She was the daughter of the man who saved the world from Cell! She would be strong! Proud! Confident! "May I please talk with Bulma?" she squeaked, nearly taking a step back when he frowned at her. 

"No." And with that, he slammed the door in her face.

Okay, now it was personal. Little Mr. Grumpy Treasure Troll on Steroids over here was _not_ going to get away with this. She continued ringing the doorbell until he finally opened the door once more, looking less than amused at seeing her face. "I don't think you heard me, _sir_," she almost put her hand in the doorway, but knew this man would have no qualms about shutting the door on it. "I said I want to speak with Bulma, _please_."

"My hearing is just fine, you insolent little brat," his gaze swept over her arrogantly. "You must be the girl Gohan has been blathering about for the past few weeks. His, what did he call it?  Ah yes.  His newest _friend_."

It took all the restraint Videl had not to kick the man in the shins.

"Bulma's currently not home. Now get off of my property," he promptly shut the door in her shocked face once more.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!" Vegeta grinned evilly as he heard the mini-harpy-in-training scream at the top of her lungs. "IT'S A CONSPIRACY!!! I HATE THESE PEOPLE!!!"

Bulma walked into the living room, raising her eyebrow at Vegeta's wicked smile. "Vegeta, you didn't put a dead squirrel in the mail slot for the mailman to find again, did you? The poor man is sixty and he almost had a heart attack! Give him a break."

"First off, it was a raccoon, not a squirrel. Secondly, that poor excuse for a parcel carrier deserved it. If I didn't get even with him, someone else would have, make my words, woman."

Bulma rolled her eyes. "Just because the newest Danielle Steel novel came a week late doesn't give you the right to kill the mailman," she muttered under her breath. "Anyway, if it wasn't the traumatized postman, who was it?"

"That Satan brat. She was looking for you," Vegeta sneered at his wife. "One more word about that book and I'll tell her about that little room where you and Kakkarot's first mistake concoct those pathetic plans to annoy her."

Bulma grinned. "Oh, I saw you laughing when you saw the newspaper article. Don't you try to deny it," she poked her husband in the chest. 

Okay, he had to give it to her.  The newspaper article was rather ingenious. 

But he had more important people to deal with right now.

Like Arizona and Trent, who were currently having a torrid love affair even though he's her half uncle… Maybe if Vegeta was REALLY lucky, there might even be some BONDAGE in the newest Danielle book!

Without a second thought he walked off to go finish "Hearts in Chains."

"Now THAT woman is pure genius."

* * *

Videl slumped down into her chair, clicking on the television. Maybe she could watch some mind numbing television and forget all about Gohan Son. Even better, she could change schools and NEVER have to see him again.  God willing, anyway.

She clicked on channel seven and began to watch the news, hoping to get her mind off Gohan by watching some violence in the real world.

"THIS JUST IN!!! URGENT NEWS!!!"  said the pretty newscaster.  Videl began to get up, ready to go kick some bad guy butt.  Oh God, did she want to kick some criminal's ass right about now and pretend he was Gohan.  She feared for the poor crook, actually.  She nearly had her jacket on when she looked back to the television and saw a split screen of her and Gohan, which made it seem like they were smiling at each other. "It has been confirmed that GOHAN SON AND VIDEL SATAN ARE BEST FRIENDS FOREVER!!! That is all."

Videl gawked.   Really.  She just stood there, watching the news but not really seeing any of it.  Her mind whirled.  Her head hurt.  She couldn't find the energy to be annoyed.  She couldn't find the strength to be angry.  She was just so, so tired.

"I've got to swallow my pride," she decided. "My sanity depends on it."

With a dejected look on her face, she walked to her front lawn and got into her jetcopter.  She flew, at a moderate speed, towards the mountains.  She opened the windows and breathed in the country air, and tried to ignore the voice in her head telling her she was making the biggest mistake of her life.

She landed, and, after convincing herself not to run away one last time, brought up her hand to knock on Gohan's door.  However, before she even got a chance, the door flew open.

Gohan stood, a bit surprised, on the other side.  He was wearing a dark blue _gi_, and was clearly on his way out. "Hi Videl! What a nice surprise."

And there it was.  The smile.  But this time, it wasn't overly innocent or angelic.  It was genuine and true.  He really _was_ happy to see her.

Go figure.

"Gohan, I give up," she told him honestly, trying to keep the defeat from her voice.  "From now on we're friends, okay?"

For a moment, Gohan just stared at her.  First he looked confused, and then suspicious, and then, finally, intrigued.  As if he were a little boy who had just gotten everything he asked for on Christmas and now didn't quite know what to do with himself.

And then he started laughing.

She had been a good sport until then, but really.  Look what he was subjecting her to!  And now he had the nerve to LAUGH AT HER? "WHAT THE HELL IS SO FUNNY?!"

Gohan poked her nose with his finger. "I'll let you in on a little secret, Videl. We've been friends this WHOLE time! And you never even knew it.  Isn't friendship great?"

"Yeah.  Great."

* * *

As Videl made her way upstairs and to her bedroom, she felt strangely light.  No more messages, she thought with glee.  No more announcements, no more presents. Life was good again, indeed. 

Suddenly, as she was getting ready for bed, she heard her pager go off.  She blinked.  She hadn't used the pager since the eighth grade, and no one paged her anymore… it was probably someone who had the wrong number.

She reached into the drawer where she had been keeping it and grabbed it.

_Will you go out with me?  
                             3 Gohan_

"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!AAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"


End file.
